*Deep Breaths* Here I am attempting to write a blog as an impulse decision. I haven’t done hours of research on this, or anxiously obsessed over whether this is a good decision or not. This is very untrue to my nature. Right about now the self-doubting voice in my head is chiming in reminding me that a) my writing sucks b) no one will probably read this and 3) there’s no point in coming up with a third reason since no one is reading this.
Truth be told, I am writing this regardless of what the self-doubting voice says. I am writing this regardless of who reads it because I need to heal and grow, and despite my subpar writing skills I believe in the therapeutic abilities of baring your soul on pen and paper (eh.. keyboard and desktop?). This might be the first time in my life that I am attempting something without the expectations of succeeding or the fear of failure. I am doing this just to do. Hopefully as time passes my awareness will expand (and my writing will get better? *crosses fingers*) and I will see a positive shift in my life.
The title that I chose for my blog may suggest that I’m some enlightened guru who is here to help you raise mini Buddhas. Let me shock you right now and tell you I’m not! Awakened (in reference to a spiritual awakening) is what I aim to be. Having a kid (my son EJ was born in 2011) made me want to be the best me I could possibly be (too cliché?). But the kicker is that having a toddler often brings out the big, bad, ugly monsters hiding in our inner closets that we stuffed away in our own childhoods.
So here I am, a year and a half into raising my little and I already feel like I’ve scarred him for life! That’s where this blog comes in. This is where I’m committing to actively kicking my butt into gear. I am using this blog as my proverbial mountaintop and yelling for all (or none) to hear: “I want change!”. I am making multiple changes in my current lifestyle and I hope to document them here. I will describe these changes in more detail in later posts and hopefully others going through similar changes will follow along and learn with me. These changes will mainly focus on my physical health, my spiritual self, and my relationship with others (especially EJ). One person that reads this and resonates with me, is one person who I am thankful for. I’m not sure where this journey is taking me but I’m buckled in and ready to go, who’s got shotgun?
Love and Light,
The Awakened Momma