I jumped out of a plane today!! I’m typing this so luckily that means I didn’t die :-p. My 27th birthday was last week and although the hubby wanted to surprise me on my actual birthday, Hurricane Irma the week before meant the Skydive center was having power issues on that day. It was one of the most memorable things I’ve ever done. We chose not to get pictures or videos, which at first I worried I might regret but then I realized that it was a perfect opportunity to experience the moment to the fullest knowing that I’d never get it back. Of course that is true of every moment; once it’s gone, it’s gone… but in this age of social media sometimes it feels like we’re supposed to care more about the memory than the actual moment itself. I am so glad that this moment is mine and mine alone, video wouldn’t have done what I felt justice anyway
Seriously, don’t let the pretty pictures and inspirational quotes on my Instagram mislead you. I stumble and even fall on the regular.
You guys, this is not a drill! Its November of 2016!!! Who’s responsible for this? How did we get here? Did someone forget to take their finger off the fast forward button?? WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?!!
*Deep Breaths* Well, we’re here now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
So… that means that there’s only 33 days left until we’re supposed to start making outrageous promises to ourselves and Read the rest of this entry
As much as I dislike labels I love that today is national coming out day and I’m loving reading all these coming out stories being shared on the interwebs! On June 12th 2016 when 49 LGBTQ lives were brutally taken I wept and I wept for weeks afterwards because although I never really cared to label myself, those were my people; I identified with them. They were free spirits who loved who they loved and who were true to themselves (even if just in places like Pulse where they were supposed to be safe).
In my ideal world labels would be useless because we would all just see each other for the beautiful souls we are and that would be that. I’m an optimist so I have hope that we are moving closer and closer to that ideal world but until then I have to admit that labels do serve a purpose. Labels tell others “Look, you’re not alone! I’m with you!!” Anyone who’s ever been desperately lonely can tell you how powerful that statement is. In a world filled with 7 Billion people, no one should ever feel like they are the only one!
So here I am, about to type out the words that I’ve only uttered to a select few, my brain trying to assure my trembling fingers that this is no biggie. I’m bisexual… This doesn’t change anything and it changes everything. Some people will inevitably look at me differently but I don’t care about those people, those are not my people. The ones I care about are the ones who will look at me and say “You are who you are so that means I can be who I am!!!” Those are MY people. I’m doing this for me and I’m doing this for you. I love you ❤
The Awakened Momma
This man. This man loves me better than I love myself sometimes. In fact, in so many ways he’s the reason I know the importance of loving myself. To have him as my best friend and confidant is a magnificent blessing.
Tonight, as I’ve done many other nights, I came to him with heaviness in my heart. Feeling frozen, confused, fearful… I wish I could adequately describe the way our souls danced in collaboration while we conversed to lift the burdens in my heavy heart. It was almost like magic, the magic of being in the presence of a soulmate.
Before we said goodnight and after I showed him a poem that I’m working on (coming soon to a blog post near you), he dug up an old poem he wrote and recited it to me…
“Trying to piece it all together,
as I sit on the wall
Until gravity whispers, “everything falls”
Then the cracks in the puzzle fall through cracks in the ground
The blueprint escapes waiting to be found
Lost in the abyss, everyone forgets
and everything was forgotten ever since
Lost in September, gone by December
Reignited in March, in June we remember
A grid on the stars and a grid on my face
A grid on this paper, what is this place?
I question the mark, I question the skies
I question a question, for all is disguised
With my new lenses I reach spiral stairs
I climb to the top, the puzzle is there
So I choose a door, through it I crawl
Only to find myself sitting on a wall.”
It was music to my ears and food for my soul. I’ve been starving myself of the arts that make my soul come alive. I don’t want to do that anymore. Thanks for the reminder babe ❤
Love & Light,
The Awakened Momma
Things that bring me child-like joy:
🌾The smell of Lemongrass
💜The color purple (and teal)
😂Laughter (especially my children’s)
🎶Happy music (especially dancing my heart out to it)
🎙Singing my heart out (forever butthurt that I wasn’t born with singing voice though)
🌌Looking at the sky
🎨Good art in any form
💓Having a positive influence on my surroundings
👫👫Being around likeminded people.
When was the last time you stopped to think about the things that bring YOU child-like joy? The joy of a child is like the magical language of the universe yet there is such little emphasis placed on mastering this language in our society. Even I’m guilty of not implementing a lot of the things on this list into my daily routine. But why tho?!! Joy is freaking amazing!! Why are we holding back from experiencing more of it?!!
Making this list made me realize that putting off certain things for when I have “more time” is the biggest mistake I’m making. Are you making this same mistake too? I challenge you… Write a list of some of the things that bring you child-like joy, then make it your goal to incorporate as many of those things into your life on a consistent basis as possible. Do this, and watch the magic of the universe unfold before your eyes 💗💗💗
I’ve never appreciated my existence as much as I do now,
I’ve never meditated as deeply as I can now,
I’ve never hugged my loved ones as tightly as I do now
I’ve never been as free as I am NOW.
And all this due to a decision I made 22 days ago.